I was jealous!!!

Apr 25, 2022

Abundance tribe, today is day 18 of my 60 days series.

I am sharing another excerpt from my book…

“That night, I went into Kem’s room, as though I had an unfinished business. I went into his room, like a hen, trying to protect her chick. My emotions led the way, not my brain. It was as though Kem was expecting to see me as well. “Come here. Come. Sit. Or are you shy because that girl is here?” I had never seen Kem that way. So I wondered why he sounded bold, like someone who was ready to fuck that night. I moved closer to him.

I sat on his bed, resting my head on his chest. I was happy and scared at the same time. Happy that the dark-skinned girl was not the one whose head was on his chest. I was also scared because I knew we both were never brave enough to act on our feelings. We never kissed. We never took off our clothes. If we could not have these two, how then do we have sex, or go even deeper? I was also scared because the dark-skinned girl already had her suspicions, and I did not want to give her more facts. She was also in Kem’s living room. I was not sure if she was sleeping, or pretending to.

I challenged Kem for laughing when the dark-skinned girl was teasing him. He told me he was just being friendly. Kem and I just stared at each other and after a while, I returned to the living room. The dark-skinned girl was on the bed. I was not sure if she was sleeping or not. I reclined on Kem’s love seat. I could not bring myself to sleep. I was consumed by jealousy.

Very passionate jealousy of a woman, burning with love and strong desire for a man whom I could not freely flirt with, yet a dark-skinned girl after a few hours of interacting with my friend of several months, had the moral right to flirt with him. I was jealous! However, what right did I have to be jealous over what was not even mine yet? What right did a woman who was committed to an unfaithful partner have, to be jealous over someone she should not even be loving? I was jealous that my feelings had to be silenced, so as not to be shamed.”

I continue the series on addiction. Today, I shared about on a wrong behavioral coping strategy, work addiction

Watch here:

Listen here: https://anchor.fm/bisola-mariam/episodes/Work-addiction-e1hkj6u

My book launch is around the corner. I need your help. No matter your location, you can donate to support me, as I share my story with the world please. I can not do this by myself.