"No, that wasn't what I said. You are making it up"

As written in my book, Broken Child, Broken Adult.

It’s day 43 of my 60 days series.

Today, I wish to share with you, another sign that your partner is a narcissist.

Let’s consider these two scenerios. The first is hypothetical, that is, an example from my imagination.

You just finished having a discussion about what to cook as dinner. You both agreed to cooking jollof rice, and you made the food and it served. Only for you to finish cooking, and for this partner to come into the kitchen and say, “ wait, is this what we are having for dinner. Rice again? I don’t want rice. We always eat rice in this house.

That's confusing right, especially after you both had that conversation about choice of food. A narc. will make you go crazy! And a narc. can be male or female. I can give countless hypothetical examples, but would do that in the BM’S academy.

Let’s move on my personal example. In my book, How To Kill Your Spouse, on page 106 of that book, I shared about the way he used to text other women, and when I challenged him, he would deny it, and make it seem as though I was making things up, where they didn't exist. He would say “I am not sleeping with any woman, or has anyone come to you, saying she's pregnant for me?” This is a classical example. Now, you will begin to doubt your reality. What they do and makes you doubt yourself is called gaslighting, and it is wrong!

Now here is an activity that you can do:

Think about situations when your partner said something and you were very sure that was what your partner said, and how that partner said that was not so, and that you are the one making things up. Write as many of these situations down.

How do you feel when this happens? Write the emotions or feelings that comes after it.

Next, device a strategy that allows you track everything this person says so that this person never minimizes you, and keep your proof so that you have something to defend yourself with when there is a reason to do so.

What’s coming up?

In the month of June, I will open up the BM’S academy for membership. Membership fee is $1. This has to be renewed monthly.

In this academy, I will provide mentorship on these signature areas.

1. Clarity and healing strategies for victims of toxic relations/ domestic. This is the first key subject to be covered. I will prioritize questions on t subject in the academy. This coaching will usher us into World Domestic Violence Day in October.

2. Clarity for scholars looking to secure funding to study, or conduct research abroad.

3. Clarity for scholars with long time study plans, victims of domestic violence without financial empowerment, but are looking to build a sustainable source of income online or offline.

I will be a year older in exactly 2 days from today.

May 31st precisely, and I will be making some big announcements, which am so excited about!!!! 😊 💃

I will be making these announcements live, during my book launch, and I don’t want you to miss it.

If you are outside the United States, and would like to attend my book launch and birthday party, please visit www.bisolamariam.com/becomingbm to RSVP. It is free to RSVP to attend online. This is a special link for those on my email list.

Register at www.bisolamariam.com/becomingbm

I am also taking donations for my book launch. Please give here at 👇🏿https://gofund.me/3857607a

When you give, you allow us support other victims of domestic violence and abuse, by empowering them with my story, which can inspire them to find their clarity or even tell their stories. I know you will support me!

Donate here again: https://gofund.me/3857607a

I am also taking birthday reviews.

Your messages will be shared live, during my book launch.

Share birthday wishes here.

https://forms.gle/hUBdr1Xv9p72S7xNA

Talk soon,

Abundance is here.